Nothing has to make sense. I am fine with the way things are. I don't have to figure out why, what and how. I am here to have experiences. There is no straight line nor cause and effect.
For 10 weeks we were told that my son isn't getting unemployment. This has brought out different responses of even relief for not receiving any income. When I accepted it, a letter came to inform us that he is getting a little bit of money. External events are based on what is supposed to be accomplished within me and not how the government is set up. One moment its all 'Noooo' and the next its all 'Yess'. There are no rules nor limitations. When all my emotions have been processed the situation can turn around, but may not.
We had our cabin broken into and a $2,000 trailer stolen. My son was hired for a one day assignment and didn't get paid, he got scammed. The truck still hasn't been repaired after 3 weeks of sitting at the shop. It just keeps going on and on. It doesn't matter. I am ecstatic. Life no longer has to be a certain way. Nothing is going the way we imagine it. The mind is constantly being set up to get lost.
The mind has an opinion about everything. It filters life's events until there is no reality left, only illusion. With my mind constantly being tricked, my mind doesn't know where it stands and has to look at what's really going on and has to release all this wishful thinking that life is going to get better in the future. Life is getting better and worse.
That's why I am going out of my mind often. Hurray, I am losing my mind. Nothing is going the way I was taught: "When you do this, you get that." No, that's not the way it goes.