Sunday, January 27, 2013

Non-dual Prayer - The Art of Spiritual Healing

Joel Goldsmith - The Art of Spiritual Healing

Go into No-thought.  Let go of what is wrong with the person.  Go into No-thought, just absolute presence for 2-3 minutes.

There is absolute perfection in the realm of the formless.  And that is the essence of the person who needs healing.  

Go into deep stillness where nothing is needed.  You take the form into the formless where the form is no longer.  There is no condition to be treated.  

Prayer is listening to God rather than talking to God.  Listening does not mean you are waiting for an answer, because than you are not really listening.  In listening you are not waiting for anything.  There is just a field of pure attention.  Not even wanting an answer, its enough to be in silence.  It is relaxed alertness.

I have a simplified version of this:  That which is observed changes.

Thursday, January 24, 2013

The 'Sick Card'

When life becomes stranger than fiction we have arrived.  We are the ones we've been waiting for.

The universe still pulls the sick card, meaning, that people are still so much in their heads that the universe has to make them sick to keep them from creating more havoc.  There is so much more waiting for us but people keep re-creating the same old, same old, all at the level of survival.

Unless you are as a child you shall not enter the kingdom of heaven.  Children live in the moment.  Abundance is all they know until grownups teach them otherwise.

The disappointment of 12/21 has silenced authors.  People had great expectations that life would change drastically when the Mayan calendar ends.  Nothing much happened.  It was the universes way of saying that our little minds are not in charge, that the universe has something much greater for us.

My son's co-workers raised $2300.00 for him but the man in charge used it for himself.  We always have what we need, effortlessly provided by the universe.  Money has become an uninteresting subject to me. Whenever I need money it just shows up.  Breathing and staying out of my mind takes care of everything.

Sunday, January 20, 2013

The Dark

My ex has been spreading vicious lies about me and people belief him.  Now I know why they have been behaving rudely towards me.
The dark does not like much the light, everything that is beyond its comprehension and control it basically hates as it knows the high vibes will force the dark to perish and change into high vibes.  Change freaks the hell out of them, so their behavior towards me becomes very dark.  My light puts the spotlight right on their dark hideaway.  It highlights their pain, makes it come out for healing.  They do not wish to face themselves, so they want me gone. 

My very presence upsets them.  I get blamed for so much.  Same with my dad, he would attack me relentlessly and asked me to leave.  I would never say anything, just be still, and yet, they would find problems.  That's why I have to be very careful, people will turn on me in an instant.  It's the light that I carry.  I finally get that.

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Integrating the recent new energies

The 15th of January brought massive new energies, which made it difficult for me to breathe.  I am finally stabilizing.

I am staying with my son at his step-moms house.  Her husband, my ex, moved out but is coming here every day to pick up his stuff.  He's a hoarder and has until middle of March to remove his things from this place.

My son wants to move back to the mountains next month, I don't think that's going to happen.  I think the universe has other plans for us.  

There are two more surgeries and several doctors appointments.  My son has a tiny metal umbrella in one of his veins to keep blood clots from reaching his heart; and his bone flaps (frontal skull bones) still need to be put back into his skull, until then he has to wear a helmet because his brain doesn't have the protection of his bones, they are presently in the lab.  He will fully recover from the accident and he is aware of how lucky he is.

I have been talking to him about the feminine energy coming back to this planet and why this accident happened to him.  He is very receptive to it.  The universe provided a rude awakening for him, which will cost about half a million, but as always, the universe has made provision.  My son has excellent insurance and we'll only have to pay $1,500.00 deductible.

For about 7 months prior to the accident I kept seeing 911 on the digital clock.  I knew it was a warning of some sort but never thought it would be of such severity that would bring drastic changes for my son to join me in the new world.  He all of a sudden turned into an old soul with much wisdom.  My daughter had her awakening last Summer using mushrooms.  I guess to each his own.

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Becoming Lighter

Volcanic Ash Dunes of Tarvurvur, Papua New Guinea

I am going through massive transformations.  I am allowing this moment to be as it is.  I don't meddle with it, I accept it and observe it.  I don't identify myself with form and allow space to enter.  

By allowing the form of this moment to be as it is I enter the formless.  I don't identify with my thoughts, they come and go.  There is so much more space in my life.  Automatically a lot of baggage has been dropped.  Space and stillness where nothing is needed, where everything is perfect as it is.

I don't know anything at all.

Thursday, January 10, 2013


My ex and his wife are now legally separated.  He's supposed to move out by Monday.  He found a place with 2 acres and says its for me and my son.  He gave me the key.  Knowing him he's going to live there also.  That would really be twisted, moving in with my ex.  I don't think the universe is going to allow that.

I have a place for a week, after that I don't know.  Nothing is going to happen the way I think.  There is a plan that is so beyond the mind that my mind is flipping.

Everything is always changing.  The universe has written a plot that likens a soap opera.  Twisted, insane and sick.  I am looking for a normal life.

In the world of illusion that which is insane appears sane and that which is sane appears insane.

Nothing is as it appears.

Sunday, January 6, 2013

The straw that broke the camel's back

Living in the Truck for a month accomplished 2 things that I am aware of: driving me out of identification with form, and dissolving the ego.  I am neutral and have no desire for anything, maybe because I am just too damn worn out.

Looking for yourself in an external form causes suffering because that's not the essence of who we are.  Making form work for you doesn't mean that your life is working.  People want to change their lives by changing the forms in their lives.  I don't have to add anything to myself.  I don't have to exert effort to be me.  If you use effort to be you than you think that there is something wrong with you, that you are not enough.  I can move through life effortlessly.

My computer wasn't working and I used the courtesy phone at IKEA to contact my son so that he won't worry about me when he doesn't hear from me for a few days.  I then went to the cafeteria to drink hot water to hydrate myself for yet another long night in the truck.  As I sat there my sons step mom came looking for me urging me to come home with her.   As soon as we reached her house my body gave out completely.  I had a pinched nerve and it was excruciating.  My body won't survive another night in the truck.  I think I am done with that experience.

The next morning we had a family meeting.  Her brother was not at all happy that I was living in the truck.  He told my ex that this is not the way to treat the mother of your children.  Not only was my son recovering from a severe accident he also had to worry about my safety.  His step mom begged his dad daily to put me up in a motel but he wouldn't.  That broke the camels back.  He is being served papers to vacate the premises within 60 days, she's filing for separation.

My sons step mom took her last pennies and reserved a room for me at a motel for 4 nights.  My son will be joining me tonight. 

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Presently I hate the form of the NOW

I am looking forward to being done with this, yet I know this is exactly what I need.  I go out of my mind often because there is no form for me to identify with, nothing familiar to fall back to.  There is nowhere to hide.
I am actually sighing a sigh of relieve that I am having this experience.  It's making me lighter.   There is so much space being created in my life for something new to emerge.  And the Matrix won't be part of it.  Whatever is going to show up will blow my mind.  At least that's what I think.

Allowing the Now to be. Then life lives through you and life is intelligent.  ~Eckhart Tolle

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

The Evolution of our Consciousness

This experience is the most helpful for the evolution of my consciousness.  I am being led away as far as possible from my former life. 

I am getting used to not doing anything, sleeping when I want, not having to answer to anyone.  I don't know how my life is going to be put back together when I come out of this phase, but I know that I can't go back to the way things were.  A big line is being drawn under my life.

My voice has changed because my emotions are being dealt with and my nervous system is being stretched.  My body needs much less food.  I have been able to eat only around 500 calories per day.  I don't know if this is a temporary situation because I don't have cooking facilities available or if this is my new way of life.  I feel strong and balanced.