I am walking in the dark. I don't know what reality is. This planet doesn't know reality. If it did we would be living different lives.
To keep going down the rabbit hole the mind has to be tricked. When I can't go on a mirage appears, or alternate reality, something good I belief is going to happen, but it never does. When I get to that point the mirage disappears and I can go on because I am stronger.
It's like being in the desert. I go from mirage to mirage to mirage, having a carrot dangling in front of me and never reaching it. Because ALL the illusion has to go before I get to have a life.
Nothing I plan is working out, so I lose my mind. The universe gets me to lose my mind. My life doesn't depend on my mind.
The mind wants things to stay familiar and linear. The mind hates change but change is all there is. If you don't change you are insane, but you don't know it because your life looks so sane.
Illusion looks sane, reality looks insane. To leave the world of illusion we have to walk through a lot of insanity.
I have to get tricked to leave illusion and eventually I will get my treat.