Thursday, February 28, 2013


My son had his last surgery yesterday.  He now has 3 titanium plates and 12 titanium screws in his head holding his frontal skull bones together at the cost of $800 per screw.  He says he has a better reception with his phone.

With that out of the way we can now move forward.  There was a sudden shift in energy and I felt lost.  My walls of illusion came crashing down.  There doesn't seem to be any ground for me to step on.  I have to linger in this space of nothingness until I have processed all the uncomfortable and unfamiliar energies.  My mind doesn't comprehend any of this.   Therefore I let my body carry what my mind can't.  The body always knows what to do.  Its a time of  emptying out and letting go. 

Monday, February 25, 2013

No more 3D for me

It has taken me awhile to figure out what has happened in my life recently because it has changed so much and I couldn't put my finger on it.  

I have left 3D where people identify themselves with their thoughts and emotions, where life is based on rigid rules and structures.  I have moved into a free based dynamic.  

I don't have an intellectual concept of anything.  It's strictly present time.  I am no longer that freight train of who I am not.  I am very aware of my inner terrain.  And that has become the basis for everything I do.  I had to unlearn the Matrix.  Now its all new territory and unfamiliarity from here on.  No one can ever take me out of this core element of myself.  There are no 'shoulds' and 'musts'.

The mind has so much power over people.  Its an incredible tool when its the servant, but as the master its destructive and harmful.  People belief everything their mind is telling them, never questioning its validity.  It's not through the mind, through thinking that the miracle of life is created or sustained.  There is an intelligence far greater than the mind at work.

An emotion is the body's reaction to the mind.  When we are not aware of our emotions the body reacts through symptoms and making us ill.  An emotion is an energetic imprint in the body that runs the body when we are not aware.  Awareness heals everything.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

The year of the snake, shedding the old

Modern physics has proven that what we perceive through our 5 senses is more unreal than its real.  Our intellects can only take us so far.  We are constantly having to adjust.

Everything we have been taught, have learned, everything we know is based on a lie, a projection within a projection, an illusion within an illusion.  Our physical world only appears to be real when in fact it is not.

Intuitively we know that there is a limit to human reasoning, that the human mind can take us only so far.  Knowledge is only gained through experience.  We need to transcend our intellects and move beyond reason.  

Old viewpoints and conditioned ideas of reality require mental re-adjustment.  This is quickly done when we allow ourselves to be and be with what is.  No mental planning of any kind, no agendas.  This moment prepares us for the next.

Thoughts of fear are merely releases of our illusions and conditioning.  Old outmoded believes are falling away like a snake shedding its skin.  This shedding causes catharsis at times, even if only for a moment we get to look at what we are releasing.

DNA material that was previously considered junk by scientists will begin to be activated.  The capacity of using our minds will increase.  Our minds will function in a new way.

A poll shift is underway with continuing earth changes.  This is a time of deep transformation.  We are always in flux.  We will never again return to the old.  Its over.

Reincarnation is a fantasy. Existence has never had a form that could be repeated. It's forever unformed. The shifting of galaxies on the far side of the universe is the same shifting event of our bodies and minds. This happening has never become anything in particular; it's only shift and flux. There's no thing becoming some other thing; there's one great unformed presence remaining unformed.
--Darryl Bailey

Friday, February 1, 2013

The formless

Our little wagon that stores our furniture until we are ready to move on

We received a letter from the surgeon to pay $800 up front to have my son's frontal skull bones put back in.  Failure to do so could result in the surgery being cancelled.  The medical term for this procedure is Autologous Cranioplasty - Bilateral.  I told them that we didn't have the money.  They will proceed with the surgery as scheduled at the end of February.

I no longer feel ashamed telling people that I don't have the money to pay for certain things.  All that stigma has dropped off my energy field.  Money issues no longer face me.  I don't feel like a pauper nor second class citizen. I am living off the crumbs of others, way below the poverty line.  My life is so simplified, I don't need much at all, no filling spaces with objects.  There is no fretting where I am going to live nor how my needs will be met.  I alone am enough.

I heard that the vibration of gratitude is higher than the vibration of Love.

I continue to lose identification with form.  At times this feels eerie.  Suffering comes from the attachment to form.  

Form is whatever the perceiver makes it.  The physical world is an illusion.  The perceiver looks at form through a filter, the conditioning.  This filter makes people incongruent, they say one thing and do another, the illusion we hold of ourselves.  They may accuse others of being wasteful when in reality they themselves are wasteful.  Whatever I accuse others of is in me.  Being present makes me congruent with who I really am, the formless essence of me.